Algebra Tells All

Recently I was hanging out with Kelli, Brian and Bevin.

I'm a big fan of Bevin's. Any lesbo babe who seeks refuge from bad lesbian poetry by whipping out a Game Boy is awesome in my book.

We were really bored at this spoken word event, so Brian was telling me about his theory that urine smell and crazy are directly proportional and illustrated this with an equation.

I like this idea of describing everyday phenomena using math and was inspired to create this.

PROBABILITY THAT DALE WILL LEAVE THE HOUSE

P = Probability I'll leave the house.
Mb = The number of Megabytes of Unwatched Programs on my Tivo
JO = The number of times I've jerked off in the last 48 hours

That is to say, the probability I'll leave the house equals ten over the number of Megabytes of Unwatched Programs On My TiVo to the power of the Number of Times I've Jacked Off in the last 48 hours.

So, for example, if I've jerked off 3 times and have 80 Megs of programs to watch, the chance of me leaving the house is only 10/80^3 = 0.16%.

If I've only jerked off once and have only 20 Megs of programs to watch, it goes up to 10/20^1 = 50%.

But remember, that any number raised to the power of zero, is one. So if I haven't jerked off at all, it doesn't matter how full my TiVo is, the probability I'll leave the house is 1,000%.

So you see? High school algebra was useful in daily life after all.