The USPS R2-D2 Mailbox Makes Me Happy

The Ex-Hippies Have Spoken

My neighborhood said "no". So the war must be the fault of those hate-mongers up in Inwood.

Macy Is Back!

If you missed it back in 2005 now you can see it on YouTube....

Hey Boys and Girls!

It's time for everyone's favorite show ... Where's Macy?

Will You Be My Friend?

I have subscribed to and canceled Netflix several times. Which suggests that I have mixed feelings about the service ... not the case. It's just that when I've exhausted most of what I wanted to see in my Queue, I turn it off for a few months.

With my upgrade to hi-def it's all fresh and new again. And the friends feature is much more than a novelty. It's quite helpful to see my friends' ratings and reviews when trying to find the gems among the trash.

So be my Netflix friend!

Just click the link and the next time you log in, you could be greeted by the message, "Your friend Dale is watching Slutty Summer!"

Would You Please Dumb That Down?

Tonite I tried to submit a movie review to Netflix and received this reply,

"This review contains one or more words that is larger than 25 characters. All words in a review must be smaller than 25 characters. Please change any words that exceed this length."

Apparently we Americans need to be protected from fancy words.

Only in New York City ... at Midnight...

... will you find an Ice Cream Truck "manned" by a drag queen.

I love this town.

Albino Sunflower Bike

If VanGogh had built a bicycle, this would be it.

My Mother Is Either a Comic Genius or Bat-Shit Insane

This morning, as I drowsily sipped my coffee and opened my email, I got the living daylights scared out of me when the first thing I saw was the subject line "Donna Lynn Sorenson Obituary".

Turns out my Mom is not, in fact, dead. Nor is she dying.

The message was my mother sending the obituary she has written for herself out to all five of her children.

Because it's written in the past tense, I find reading it to be mind-bogglingly creepy.

In this obituary, my mother, a former English teacher, misspelled her own first name.

She also had this to say about it, "I tried to keep it somewhat short since every word "costs"--always the bargain-hunter 'til the end!"

Either this is the best practical joke she's ever pulled, or she is out of her fucking mind. And as the universe is my witness, I have utterly no idea which it is.

Here's How To Know When It's Time To Leave The Work Party

"Hey, Dale. I've always wondered, are you a top or a bottom?"

"Check, please!"

Podcast-A-Go-Go

So guess what I've just discovered?

Podcasting!

Yes, yes ... I'm so very cutting edge.

Actually, I checked out podcasting when Apple first added it to iTunes and found the technological interesting but the content to be banal. That has changed.

Here are my picks. All of them are free. If you don't own an iPod, you may still watch/listen to them in iTunes, which is also free.

TECHNOLOGY
dl.tv (best of the bunch)
This Week in Tech (news highlights with analysis)
MacBreak Weekly (Macintosh and Apple stuff)
Circuits with David Pogue (mostly gadgets)
X-Play (video games reviews)

ART, CULTURE, ENTERTAINMENT
This American Life
The Onion News Network
The Onion Radio News
Savage Lovecast
Comedy Central: Stand-Up Video

A Family That Dorks Out Together Stays Together

Here's my brother, Burke, conducting the Star Wars Theme.

No really.

My brother.

Conducting.

The Star Wars Theme.

No.

Really.



Nerd runs in the family genes.

It brings tears to my eyes.

Fellowship of the Really Pissed Off Nerds

OK, kids. It's time for remedial question and answer time.

QUESTION: Who loves Lord of the Rings?

ANSWER: Nerds

QUESTION: When you offer a nerd a choice between less of something the nerd loves or more of something the nerd loves, which does the nerd choose?

ANSWER: More

QUESTION: Who are the early adopters of high-definition home theater?

ANSWER: Nerds

QUESTION: Which release of Lord of the Rings offers more Lord of the Rings, the theatrical release or the extended edition?

ANSWER: The extended edition

QUESTION: So given that nerds love Lord of the Rings, have high-definition home theater and want more of what they love, which version of Lord of the Rings is New Line Cinema considering releasing on hi-def DVD?

ANSWER: Why, the theatrical release without the extended scenes, of course. (Because everything on the Internet is true.)

Fuck you, New Line Cinema. Fuck you right in the ear.

I'm not touching your stinking hi-def Lord of the Rings DVDs until you put out the extended editions.

Of course, it's all a bit academic, since they haven't release or even announced anything official yet. But I've never let that get in the way of a good rant.

Oh yeah ... and fuck you too, George Lucas. How many freaking times to I have to buy the Star Wars Trilogy?

Grumble, grumble, grumble.